the courage to change the things I can
- Joëlle P
- Feb 20
- 2 min read
It is such an amazing experience to hold space for another on their healing journey, while reflecting on how my own can guide them.
Another coaching session with a client today reminded me that subtle action amidst the ocean of things we cannot change is often more powerful than we think.
As I slowly grow in my new consulting business, I am in awe of the progress I’ve made in learning to live well with a serious mood disorder. I now have a deep appreciation of the richness the bipolar experience has taught me about acceptance and letting go. And it’s often when we share those lived experiences with another that we become aware of the wisdom we ourselves have gained.
I shared with my client that, long ago, I mistakenly believed I would find peace by somehow suppressing my chaotic mood swings. The intensity of my inner-fire fuelled my hypomania and often felt like an urgent itch to scratch. Unfortunately, trying to control it by simply “not reacting” led to bigger mood dysregulation, and often with it, destructive
The courage to do “nothing” became a dream of mine, often reading Pema Chödrön and romanticising Buddhist detachment as an answer to this dysregulated roller coaster.
Once I realised that radical acceptance was actually very uncomfortable to practice, the true work came from acknowledging that I couldn’t actually change what I felt; becoming willing to simply be present with my thoughts and feelings by befriending my shadow was the answer.
This has led me to shifting my view of my life completely, from “I should just love my life and be grateful” to “I love the choices I make in my life even though I may not love all aspects of it”.
Life is full of uncomfortable experiences. Though I absolutely love how I choose to engage with the aspects of my life that I find difficult. When I view my life this way, I am empowered to be an active agent despite the things I cannot change.
STRUGGLES-2-STRENGTHS BLOG aims to connect with those experiencing Bipolar Disorder (BD) like myself, as well as those who support them, by sharing reflections on personal experiences rather than clinical perspectives. Please share with others and don’t hesitate to comment
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